In terms of your interpersonal issues with Black women: You’re going to have to do the work of figuring out why you’ve had contentious relationships with the people you’ve worked with and what you can do to avoid that in the future. It will require rigorous self-reflection and being mindful of how you perceive and treat the Black women you work with. It is difficult to say what, specifically, you should do differently because I’m not entirely clear on what you’ve done in the past. The short answer is to do the opposite of what you did previously and to hold yourself accountable.

My department works remotely, and we each choose our set hours, so long as they are within an hour or so of 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. My colleague has chosen 8 to 5. However, when I try to schedule an 8 a.m. meeting, he says it’s too early, and a little later is OK if I don’t mind him eating breakfast. He says mornings are hard because of his morning workouts. He suggests meeting at 9 a.m. Am I old-fashioned, thinking colleagues should be ready to work during their work day, unless their calendar is marked busy or out of the office?

— Anonymous

No one should ever schedule an 8 a.m. meeting. That is, indeed, far too early. People need time to ease into the workday. Now, your colleague probably shouldn’t have shared that he needs his mornings for his workouts but if we have learned anything from the pandemic and the ways workplace culture is evolving, it’s that we are more than our jobs.

Most of us can handle our work responsibilities well

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